this body of mine is a temple
i pray and i live here
i float away in spirit
but i return here
here in this body of mine
soul is not metaphorical
life is not a test
this rugged reality is real
but the body- the temple
the soul- perpetual ruins
Month: August 2022
i dress to dance and then to sit
i wake to eat to then go back to sleep
i amount to nothing to everyone
i walk to go, to arrive and then retreat
i amount to nothing to mostly everyone
i dress to dance and then to sit
i am nothing but nothing to everyone
but i’ll say this:
all that you own and achieve
can you take it with you after death?
i know with all i have, i can
we all return to death
we are the children of death
the moment we breathe our first breath
mother isn’t mother
fate would not have it that way
we all return to death
but refusal to live is punishment
this breath is not a precious stone
this life is not purpose filled prose
this body is not a perfect prison
this living is just for living
broken mirrors and unfinished pillars
here’s to the rugged reality
where sadness has visited
and after two decades
has finally left
broken mirrors and unfinished pillars
my face will never be the same
my pace is slow to react
unable to let go of the mistakes
under my smile i hide
these ruins are not metaphorical
test the patience of peace
test the waters i will
i have been flogged by life
so test the fires i will
i only come to know the winter’s love
test the patience of peace
and chaos i will bring
but i’m just this woman
this scowl is not frightening enough
i don’t know what fate is
i am as ignorant as they come
i see you
fate is a coward
hiding behind each autumn
the eyes change
but the scent doesn’t
i see you
playing hide and seek
tripping on wet leaves
and leading me down empty streets
you are a coward
fate is the ultimate deceit
here is this woman
i have to start with “I”
this me, i hide
but no more
i cannot hide no more
here is this woman
not a lord, nor a god, or a nymph
here is this I
a scowl under the smile
living at a glacial pace
carrying with me all of my mistakes
a quick interlude
I came to write The Heart of a Nymph after revisiting Letters to a Young Poet by Rainer Maria Rilke. “What is happening in your innermost self is worthy of your entire love, somehow you must find a way to work at it, and not lose too much time or too much courage in clarifying your attitude toward people” (Letter 6, p42). Something clicked and I took out my composition notebook and wrote it out. I was trying to dig something out that has been roaming around in me for awhile. An Ode to a Rugged Reality will start to roll out tomorrow to book end this August and be a companion to The Heart of a Nymph. It’s mostly inspired by Rilke’s sentiments to Kappus in his last letter, “I am glad, in a word, that you have overcome the danger of landing in one of those professions, and are solitary and courageous, somewhere in a rugged reality”. I wanted to explore what this rugged reality of mine looks like, to be a little more honest and honor it somehow. I was going to expand to 15 poems to fill the rest of the month instead of 7 but I couldn’t find it in me to and it didn’t feel right. I tend to give myself certain amount of lines, either 8 or 10. In the case of Ode to a Rugged Reality, I only gave myself 10 lines, if I can’t figure it in one chunk then I need to figure it out in the next. Or else I’ll just go on and on and on lol epic poems are great, I just don’t want to write one or I’ll never finish anything.
But anyways, thanks for reading, and I hope you are doing well in this rugged reality.
this creature i am
i plead with you
leave me this heart of mine
misunderstand me all you want
but leave this heart of mine
to do what she does
fine, fine i’ve learned the hard way
alone, i’m all alone
i swim the deepest seas
and drown curious men on a whim
this creature i am
will always be misunderstood
so i plead with you
leave me this wildish nature
life has tried to tame me
and made it all worse
i plead with you
leave this nymph alone
a repeated lesson
i’ve shed my heart over and over
and fed on others
stolen and offered
i’ve shed my skin over and over
to find the human within
i see it all
in ways i can’t describe
so i’ve shed many eyes
i’ve ripped and shed off many minds
and in their place
there i am again
a repeated lesson
learned from the stars
to feed from within
and burn through the cosmos
with grace
You must be logged in to post a comment.