The following posts will be full sections of my poetry collection called “The Lord of Ruin” written and published in 2019 (available for purchase here). I used the symbol of the swords in the tarot as my foundation to build upon it my spiritual journey. The titles of each section were inspired by the astrological correspondences of the suit of swords and I gave myself room to draw the emotional toll it took to walk through my own ruins as I spoke to God. I gave myself room to be honest with the mess, to be open to point and criticize without guilt, and to honestly have a look at how my own journey looks like through words. It was an interesting experience, and I think due to my Catholic upbringing, I will always feel blasphemous and a heretic for constantly trying to put a face to God, to try to look into their eyes and try to stand up righteously to a force I myself have conflicted feelings for. I think I will always have conflicted feelings for this force that is so very present regardless of names, of descriptions, and my own poetic taunts.