I’m dismissive of the history of my heart
this fistful of cherries and bitter melon
dismissive of all its yearning
its hopeful gaze
and its reaching arms
that I swat back in place
I’m dismissive of my heart
its history I despise
and all the words she made me say
while my mind was crumpled and stuffed in a box
I think I could no longer feel
and my heart is weeping for me
but weep no longer as I call out their names
and burn each an effigy
spill my own blood
to rid myself of this history
of constant painful breaks
I’m dismissive of the history of my heart
I no longer want to feel it
eating me from the inside out